Browsing: Growth

Making Reflection EASY in 2019

UPDATE: This article is being re-posted after an attempted hack and some technical difficulties which required a partial rollback and some new system updates.

Are you making time for reflection this year or just reading about those who are?

A lot of coaches, trainers, advisers, consultants and other people are writing and talking about taking time for some end-of-year reflection.  Some, like John Maxwell talk about taking a full week or even two at the end of each year to do in-depth study of the past year, writing lengthy analyses of the good, the bad and the ugly; and writing detailed strategic plans for the upcoming year.  My friend Mike Walsh sequestered himself in a hotel for 24 hours, and he’s going to do more.  I applaud them all, and I envy them (in a good way).

But that just doesn’t seem feasible to me right now, and maybe it’s not for you either.  So, if you can’t take or make that kind of time right now, for whatever reason…don’t feel guilty!  Don’t beat yourself up.  And certainly don’t give up!  Here are some tips for you and me.

Remember, it doesn’t have to be lengthy to be impactful.  Do you have a commute where you are not the driver?  Do you take a break for lunch?  Can you get up 30 minutes early or stay up 30 minutes later just once?  That’s enough!

  • Do you use a calendar to plan any of your day or week?  Thumb back through it.  Where did you spend your time?
  • Review the pictures on your smartphone from this past year.
  • Read back through your social media posts.

Do you notice any recurring themes?

See anything you’d like to do more of this next year?  Or maybe less?

Do you still have time left over?  Write down a few thoughts about what you have seen and look at them once in a while.

It may provide amazing insight, or just pleasant memories…both are valuable.

Start small.  You can always do more later.

You can do this! Happy 2020!

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The First Step Toward Winning is Getting Started

Businessman in the starting blocks

It is a rude awakening that one gets when you first “hang out your shingle” and discover that, actually, there are not hundreds of people just waiting for you to go into business so they can give you their money.

And then you start looking for answers and advice.

Now what? Advertise? Network? How strong is your network anyway? Call family for help? Mom will only buy so many of whatever you have to sell.

Give up on your dream?

Don’t Give Up…GIVE! Give generously of your skills, talents, and trade.

If you don’t have paying customers right away, go find some volunteer ones…where can you donate your services, and in the process produce a portfolio of your work? And possibly get a quality reference.

Can you practice your craft for yourself? Are you a painter? Paint something. Are you a copywriter? Write something. Videographer? Film something.

There is no better advertising than completed work. And no better way to advance your business than to just start.

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This is How Networks REALLY Work

Networking is a misnomer. It leads people to think that all you do is go out somewhere, make contact with other people, and then transactions will start to flow, and you’ll be in business!

Have you ever been to a “networking event”?  Did you find that you readily met people who needed exactly the goods or service that you were offering, and they were just waiting for you to show up so they could give you all of their business?  Yeah, probably not.  Because this is not how networks work. The real verb should not be “Networking” it should be Relationship-Building.  And like all relationships, they take time and effort.

Let me give you an example.  I recently came across a great quote, “Talk to yourself, don’t listen to yourself.”  There is a ton of wisdom in those few words.  I found this quote on an episode of the Success Champions podcast with Jon Gordon.  I really enjoy this podcast and it’s becoming one of my regulars, but how did I come across it, and this great quote?  Well, it goes something like this:

  1. The host of the Success Champions podcast is a guy named Donnie Boivin down in Dallas, Texas (I’m from the Seattle area).
  2. I met Donnie several months ago (May, 2019) when we were both guest panelists on a video panel discussion done in the UNleashed and UNlimited Facebook group.
  3. That group was created by a guy named Brad A Milford who I got to know pretty well in the first half of this year (2019) as I hired Brad to coach me through some business topics.
  4. I first met Brad in the Spring of 2018, through my friend Melahni Qualls Ake (from Indianapolis) who was also a member of Brad’s Facebook group. Melahni had come out to the Seattle area for a work trip, and we met up for dinner with another contact in the area that she knew.
  5. I met Melahni one evening in a restaurant and bar down in Orlando, Florida at the end of the February, 2018 International Maxwell Certification event. Melahni just happened to be in town and was meeting with other friends who were attending the IMC like I was, and we all happened to recognize each other in the restaurant. Melahni had talked about her new podcast, Everyday Leaders and so after the event, I checked it out and connected with Melahni through social media.
  6. The reason that I was in Orlando is that the IMC was a key event for me, the culmination of several months of study, as part of the John Maxwell Team.
  7. I had joined the John Maxwell Team in May of 2017 as part of my own personal growth plan, because I loved his books, live talks, and overall teaching approach on the topic of Leadership.

I could go on, tracing my introduction to John Maxwell back more than a decade, and all of the improbably links that got me to that point. But the main point here is that the above was the evolution of relationships over the course of years. Not some 2-minute introduction in the speed-round of a “professional networking event”. Real connections that pay off take time and effort.

Am I against networking events? Not at all! I encourage you to go to different events; to get out of the office (especially you who work from home) and get around other people that you don’t know.  But don’t come in with the expectation that you’re going to meet your next great client and 30 days from now you’ll be rolling in the dough.  Don’t focus on what YOU want or hope to get out of the event. In fact, try not to think about yourself or your business at all.

Instead, come in with the attitude of “who can I help here?”  As you meet people, find out about what THEY are looking for, what they are interested in, or what their ideal client looks like.  Maybe you know someone who needs what they have to offer.  But more likely, maybe somewhere down the road, you’ll bump into someone who knows someone who needs what they have to offer, and at that point, you can make a referral. But your referral is only good if you got to know the person that you are referring, and what they do, and maybe you can speak appropriately about them, because you stayed in contact with them and built a relationship where you could honestly vouch for them.  Because few people are so desperate to find a service provider that they will just take any name that you find in your giant stack of business cards that you collected at some networking event that you can’t even remember.  That is no more valuable to them, and perhaps even less so, than doing a Google search.  At least with a Google search you have a decent chance of finding some reviews to go along with the name.

So, YES, get out, go meet new people, start building relationships…it WILL pay off, but probably not right away, nor in the way you can predict right now. But it will be worth it.


It’s Never Too Late to Have a Happy New Year

Happy New Year!

So here we are, one month into 2018…how are you doing on your New Year’s Resolutions?  It is often said that after just two weeks, 80% of people have given up on their New Year’s resolutions and fallen back into the old habits of years past.  And if you regularly go to the gym, you probably believe it because you have seen that the first week of January every year it gets packed and there are long lines of people waiting to get on the treadmills, ellipticals, and other exercise machines.  In the second week, the lines are shorter, not because we have figured out how to spread out the demand, but because several people have already gotten discouraged and quit.  And by the end of the second week, and into the third, crowd levels have returned mostly to normal, with a few committed newcomers sticking with it, while the others have faded away.


But what if you didn’t get around to even getting started in January with your new plans?  Or what if your plan was like mine, to spend the last week of the year in reflection and planning for the new year, but you just never “got the time” (or more accurately, made it a priority).  I made time to reflect on the past year and went through some steps of planning for the new one, but didn’t quite complete it the way I had intended before life and work got busy again.  So what?  Am I doomed to wait another 11 months before I try again?  Just what is so special about the first of January?  NOTHING!


So if you didn’t do what you meant to do, or if you got started and then stopped, so what?  You can start again, right now, where you are, and make a change.  Block out some time in your calendar right now for the things that you wanted to do to make a better life for yourself, and get going again.  It’s never too late to have a Happy New Year!

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The Procrastination – Guilt Cycle

Procrastination leads to guilt which leads to more procrastination.

Procrastination is an insidious thing.  When you put off doing something that you know you should do, or that you’ve promised someone you would do, even when it’s a small thing, it produces a stress reaction in the body that we recognize as guilt.  And as you feel guilty for not doing what you know you should have done already, you start to avoid people who know what it is that you should be doing, which just delays getting it done even further.  This additional procrastination then compounds on the first reaction and produces more guilt.  Around and ’round it goes in a downward spiral.

The guilty feelings also start tricking your mind into believing stuff that is completely made up.  For example, you start to think, “that person is going to be upset that I haven’t done this yet”, “they think I’m horrible for not having done it yet”, or “I can’t start now, it’s too late; I would just be embarrassed”.

But the reality is that we’ve all done it, and we know how it can get away from you.  You have to remember, most people you know, whether friends or clients, or friends who are clients, actually want you to succeed.  They want you to come through; they don’t want you stuck in the downward spiral either.  Pick your time and plot your course of action; and go for it.  Action conquers fear, and this this case, it erases the guilt, too.

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